Sunday, May 15, 2011

A Frame For Change

Reframing alters a personality trance. People can change to some degree through insights and coaching in new skills -- first-order change. But they can be transformed by reframing basic assumptions, seeing and operating within the world in a completely new way.
Out of the Box Coaching with the Enneagram is now available in a revised 4th edition with new coaching tools. We're celebrating with examples from the book of how reframing can bring about transformational change:
When providing feedback to a perfectionist, you can reframe the meaning of being right: "When you've insisted on being right you've also diminished others' ability to solve problems creatively. When you integrate their assumptions, concerns, and objectives, everyone gets to be right." 
For someone who wants to succeed at any cost, walking over others along the way, a reframe might be "You can only succeed in this company when you collaborate with your peers."
Some clients get lost in their emotions. Reframing their feelings as progress toward enlightenment could include C.G. Jung's dream where he was drowning in a vat of shit while his therapist stood above. "Help me out," he cried. But the therapist pushed his head down, saying "Through, not out."
When clients who are conflict-averse reframe conflict as normal and healthy -- ferreting out unspoken values, beliefs, and assumptions, they see how disagreement can actually bring people closer together.
These and many more examples in Out of the Box Coaching with the Enneagram.